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Author Topic: An alert for everyone  (Read 15054 times)

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Chrissie

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #15 on: April 24, 2008, 12:50:38 AM »

Well, I just got a notice by an Admin of another forum that I have been accused of slamming him at other forums.  That is NOT true, but the accusation had to come from someone in this forum.  

I do not take kindly to being lied about.  Whoever did that, and reads this, had best be thinking long and hard about what he/she said.

Charis, you will notice that several people have given quite wise advice IMO, in suggesting that it is not wise to trust people (especially on the internet), when one doesn't even know them. I strongly suggest that people take responsibility for their own safety and don't leave themselves open to harassment in any Forum; IOW - don't open up freely with personal information.

However, I also believe that if one is going to take seriously, everything that they are told about other people from various Forums, they will forever be in a state of crisis and major stress. I have little time for talebearers, but I don't believe that Moderaters here can play 'nursemaid' to those who are offended by whatever happens on other Forums. We are busy enough caring for AT.
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bonnie

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #16 on: April 24, 2008, 06:40:54 AM »

Well, I just got a notice by an Admin of another forum that I have been accused of slamming him at other forums.  That is NOT true, but the accusation had to come from someone in this forum.  

I do not take kindly to being lied about.  Whoever did that, and reads this, had best be thinking long and hard about what he/she said.


Charis,

Once the tone of any group,forum or in real life has been set, it is a extremely difficult task to change course and head it in the direction you would like to see it go. Some topics are difficult to manage sucessfully, but I think can be done. Free speech is so often taken to mean, I can say, do, hurt,lie, imply about whatever I choose. Some restrictions need to apply and some rules need to be enforced. The enforcement of rules does lie in the hands of the administration and will reflect his/her personal convictions as to how others should be treated, while not dictating what others hold as their opinions. I think if you continue to stay here you will find that this forum will consider you a valuable assest in achieving that goal. I have always been amazed at thoughts and questions you bring out. Never in a demeaning way, but more than a little thought provoking. What others have lost can be a gain for adventtalk.

Being sucessful, being accepted by a quality of people that reflects who you are can be the best revenge without even striving for revenge.

You have witnessed what happens every time abuse and changing that course is brought up. It also has happened with another topic here.
Some do resent the sucess by others of what they cannot or will not do. The rapid growth recently due to some very pointed direction here is encouraging. Some are of course of the "peepng tom" mindset, others just because they can't resist what they claim to abhor, but still others are just like yourself. Seeing and feeling a different tone here among the moderator's and admin that it matters little who you are, you matter as much as the next one
Advent talk was a needed alternative to what was out there. People will congregate with like minded people. Not necessarily in religious views, but in personal moral values.
I have been getting some rather strange e-mails as well. I simply file them away with the "Junk" for future use if needed.
Following you from place to place is a little like the abusive spouse that won't let the other spouse leave. he /she doesn't want them, but to lose them reflects badly on them personally

Like the abused spouse, A particular member of a group may make the group uncomfortable,but they really do not want to see them go. I do think it is seen somehow to show the lack of the group, to see those that make them feel so exposed and uncomfortable be truly accepted elsewhere. You will probably find a little arrow shot across the bow every now and then because of it.  But take that as a positive. In time, those that really reflect the values important to you, will join you here or find a place where their own personal values are reflected.

Advent talk is just beginning, different in tone from what is already out there. It will take a lot to maintain the desired direction, but it can be done. Maritime has been there for several years and suits many that might not find the same level of comfort as here. ClubAdvenitst suits the needs of those that would not be comfortable here or Maritime as well.

Ignore the e-mails. If there is an objection from other sources as to what you say, then maybe they should not allow the objected statements to flourish and continue. Contributing the thoughts and opinions I have seen you express other places will add immeasureably here. It is the loss of others and I think they will realize the contributions were not a threat but an assest in time. But unfortunately, right now ,the assest requires something that cannot be easily given

 
« Last Edit: April 24, 2008, 06:48:36 AM by bonnie »
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Beware of those that verbally try to convince you they are Christian. Check your back pocket and make sure your wallet is still there. Next check your reputation to see if it is still intact. Chances are, one or both will be missing

charis

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #17 on: April 24, 2008, 11:42:50 AM »

Chrissie said:
Quote
I have little time for talebearers, but I don't believe that Moderaters here can play 'nursemaid' to those who are offended by whatever happens on other Forums. We are busy enough caring for AT.

::raises eyebrows::

 I never asked you to play nursemaid.  I was giving an example of what had been talked about previously in this thread.  I had never experienced it personally, so I was a bit shocked to have it on my plate.  The part I REALLY don't like is that it had to have come from THIS forum.

Thank you, Bonnie, for your input.  I appreciate it.
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Charis

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid.
~ Heinrich Heine ~

Lil Star

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #18 on: April 24, 2008, 05:44:12 PM »

Hmmm, I think I am completely lost on this one here.   :scratch:  However I do love your little smilies you keep using... I like the coffee one too!
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Chrissie

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #19 on: April 25, 2008, 01:26:02 AM »

Chrissie said:
Quote
I have little time for talebearers, but I don't believe that Moderaters here can play 'nursemaid' to those who are offended by whatever happens on other Forums. We are busy enough caring for AT.

::raises eyebrows::

 I never asked you to play nursemaid.  I was giving an example of what had been talked about previously in this thread.  I had never experienced it personally, so I was a bit shocked to have it on my plate.  The part I REALLY don't like is that it had to have come from THIS forum.

Thank you, Bonnie, for your input.  I appreciate it.

Charis, I'm sorry that you have taken offence at my remarks. That was not my intent.

This is a new Forum. I'm really hoping that 'baggage' from other Forums which sounds anything but Christian at times, does not impact AT. If there is 'baggage' in any of those, I strongly suggest that it stays there, and we get on with life over here.

AT is a new beginning. Different values. Different people. The one thing I would be disappointed with is if it became a slanging match here for what occurs in other Forums. If there is anything there you don't understand, please PM me.   :sabbath:
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daylily

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #20 on: April 25, 2008, 03:52:23 PM »

"Recently I was informed by a friend (I met this person one on one) to be very careful of a certain poster in another forum. The poster is doing and saying all the right things...  Dunno

Please be very careful. I was taken in... sigh.."

 Can you please explain a little more about what you mean?  How do we need to be careful? 
Thanks!
daylily
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bonnie

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #21 on: April 25, 2008, 05:52:32 PM »

Forums can be good experience or ugly. Many depend on forum life to have a virtual life rather than a real personal life.
Online you can easily, at least for a time, present yourself as something you are not.  At times members of forums can be contacted secretly by some that are not who they present themselves to be, to curry favor or make themselves look better. Usually it is "done as a favor" to warn you.

Just use precaution and observe. Be slow to share personal thoughts or knowledge to someone professing to want to be your friend. Even online, the true intentiions and who they are will show in time

Bonnie


PS
I do think here there will be some controls exercised over any threatening or abusive contacts thru pm's by forum members of adventtalk. It so far apears to be a pretty good group
« Last Edit: April 25, 2008, 07:11:20 PM by bonnie »
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Beware of those that verbally try to convince you they are Christian. Check your back pocket and make sure your wallet is still there. Next check your reputation to see if it is still intact. Chances are, one or both will be missing

daylily

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Re: An alert for everyone
« Reply #22 on: April 26, 2008, 04:20:56 AM »

Bonnie, thank you for your reply. I'm beginning to understand, I think.
daylily
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